TLC Application 06|08|2011 “Forming Inappropriate…Emotional Attachments”

Forming Inappropriate and Premature Emotional Attachments….

Sometimes we end up in emotional states that do not feel good.  Sometimes it is because things have happened in our life that just don’t feel good.  There are hard times that happen because we need to grow and it is time to walk through some emotions that we have put off or with which we have never really dealt.  So, emotions are being attached to areas in our life all the time… That is the way of life… But there are times where we have attached emotions to something that is not happening the way our emotions tell us it is… What then should we or can we do?  What happens when we attach emotions to something that is not really happening the way we think it is? That seems a little silly and not very intelligent.

Why would I attach emotions to areas of my life that have not been validated as being true… Or the idea I have come up with in regards to what someone has done or is doing to me… My idea of what is being done can be and is very strong and I am wrong a lot!  I conclude bad ideas about people, places and situations.  Then there are the worst premature inappropriate emotional attachments… I assume the worst and attach feelings to my assumptions… I attach bad feelings without checking with other people if they are seeing the same thing I am seeing.  I have to wonder with self-honesty to self: How many times have I seen someone or something going what I think is the wrong way and it is my mind telling me untruth?  After all is said and done I come to find out that I was wrong… None of what my mind was telling me is what was really going on…  So, were these situations or people are going the wrong way?  This always creates ill feelings in me.  Because my ego won’t let me go back and say I was wrong and I held really bad thoughts that were not valid nor were they appropriate… I think no one really knew what I was thinking,  or it would just be too embarrassing to admit, so I justify what is and always will be wrong… That is to assume the worst and then act on it… It just feels too unhealthy so I can’t bear to face it.

Or I enter into a delusional state and I get grandiose about how something is going to come about and I tell people about all these great things that are going to happen… Inside I don’t know if that is going to happen but I am on the high side of overly hopeful, only to set myself up for disappointment and the same feeling that things just don’t work out for me… Because I have attached inappropriate emotions to a premature situation.  I had to learn not to say things about good possibilities until they were actually coming true then I could let others know… Plus, when something good is in the works I don’t tell people… I have learned that some people don’t like when things look good for you and not for them.  They may not want to, but they can give you bad energy towards a very positive area in your life… Coupled with our good fortune may come to pass and others put a spin on our ideas that is not supposed to be there… But it creeps in because we opened the door prematurely and someone else injects his or her doubt in an area that we didn’t have… So keep the good possibilities with God and when they solidify with God others can know… Keep it with God in your heart and stay aware of your own doubt and treat that with God.  We don’t need other people’s doubt or fears in our new concepts…

Today commit to being aware of how much you attach emotions to situations that have not been validated as being true…

If you have a question about somebody doing something to you that hurts you or you think is wrong… Ask them if that is what they are doing.  If they say no, then until proven otherwise do not attach negative emotions to that idea that you have about them.  If you think the boss is unhappy with you ask them if there is something more you should be doing… Don’t keep telling them how much you have been doing because you have concluded they were thinking you did not measure up… Just commit to holding off attaching emotions especially if the emotions are hurtful… You see, we have to learn there are areas in life where we have been hurt and that we are sensitive to and because of that, sometimes (which means most of the time) when it comes to being hurt by people or concluding that I am being hurt by people… it could be because my mind has been triggered by prior injury to think someone is hurting me today when there are not, but my fears are telling me different.

So, I go to God with these negative feelings about situations or people and wait.  This I call the Emotional Hold Off… It builds emotional strength and maturity. Remember fears and emotions do feel real, but what if what causes those emotions and fears is not real? Then my emotions and fears, even though I am experiencing them and they are driving me to take actions or not take actions that are hurting my life, are nothing more then the Bogeyman… Therefore they are not real until someone else validates them as real.

So if you get ill feelings, ask a friend if they think the feelings you’re having are validated? Or are you creating them from your own false sense of perception and insecurities?  And be prepared to hear the answer with God.

Much love,

K.C.

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