??Monday, April 19, 2010
Family moments…
We always complain about not creating close, personal family moments… We seem to intellectualize about why we don’t have deeper conversations… Why we don’t talk about “real” things… Why we don’t get into the real issues, or even just have a nice quiet conversation about how to communicate or be closer in the family. We don’t realize that those moments happen as a by-product from spending time with our family just to spend time.
Just shooting hoops with my kid can turn into an in-depth conversation. But if I don’t go shoot hoops in the first place then there is no moment that can happen.
After shooting hoops or doing an activity, you just sit for a moment and transition. That moment becomes a blank space where all possibilities come together. Maybe you see a bird or something of depth in nature that strikes a moment that takes it into a life-changing or life-learning moment of deep, soul-to-soul connection about what life is about… What we are here for… How to better ourselves as a family… Or the topic of politics can come up, about the U.S. government and how our government operates. Because nobody wants to set aside moments to talk about politics, but when you get in a political conversation in the right mode it can tell you who somebody is and where their perspective of life is and what the possibilities of human-kind are to them.
So we make sure that we get those family moments, and we want those intense family moments, because they are a by-product of spending time with our family and just hanging out and participating in a family unit. This allows for conversations of depth to occur in the family in an intense way.
Even with friends… Why do really great, intense conversations happen usually at late night… In those “in between” zones when we’ve got nothing going on and we’re talking to our friends… You realize why we stay close is because we share those “in between” moments… Those in between moments where nothing exists other than the intensity of that conversation… Those in between moments where we’re making a transition from here to there, and it’s those moments where the pondering of life can be… Because there’s nothing going on and we seem to be in the moment… Our friends, we seem to be in a dialogue all the time and we fall into those moments all the time.
It just tells you that it’s frequency. The more frequently you’re with someone the more opportunity you have to have those really intense soul-to-soul moments where you talk about the true essence of life. Where you feel that connection to another human being about deep purpose, and what it’s all about. And what it’s all about is loving people and having loving relationships that signify such health, such abundance, such joy, intelligence, and creativity.
Our family and friends represent our direct frequency to what we align our selves with in life. When you can spend time with that, you get the positive interaction that changes and molds who you are. It’s interesting how we’re molded by our family moments… Each one of them stacks up and you can’t say which one is the one to set the future, but you realize when you look back that it was a combination of specific moments that just stuck. They stuck and they changed me forever… That conversation I had gave me my value system… We talk about cultural and cross-cultural values… We talk about inner family cultural values that come as a by-product of what you are patterned with…
It comes down to just spending time with family and friends and recognizing the importance of love. The nature of love and our friends and family and following that energy can make great things happen.
Much love,
K.C.
How appropriate for me personally that you posted this message on this day! I was in Texas (I live in LA) spending time with my grown children. It was my oldest son’s 27th birthday. We are very close, and it feels like we are even closer when we spend face-to-face time together. We had some really nice conversations, and my favorite was telling them how it really feels to be six months sober. All they remember is mom always drinking!
Thanks, KC.
Debi